How to negotiate offers when you sell your own house
Updated 12 Oct 2026 · 6 minute read
Negotiating is the part of a private sale people fear most. It's your home, so a low offer feels personal. A few simple habits take the emotion out of it and keep you in control.
Look at the whole offer, not just the price
Two offers at the same price can be very different. Check each of these:
- Price. How does it compare with recent sales nearby and with your own walk-away figure?
- Deposit. How much is it, and when is it paid?
- Conditions. How many are there, and how long does the buyer have to meet them?
- Settlement date. Does it suit your own move?
- Chattels. Is the buyer asking for anything you planned to take?
A slightly lower offer with no conditions can be worth more to you than a higher one that depends on the buyer selling their own house. See conditional vs unconditional offers.
You have three choices
- Accept. You sign, and you have an agreement.
- Counter. You change the price or the terms and send it back. The buyer can then accept, counter again or walk away.
- Decline. You say no. The buyer is free to come back with a better offer.
A counter-offer replaces the buyer's offer. Once you've countered, you can't go back and accept their original figure unless they offer it again.
How to counter well
- Don't answer straight away. Read the offer twice and sleep on it if you can.
- Counter on more than price. You can ask for fewer conditions, shorter time frames, a larger deposit or a settlement date that suits you.
- Move in smaller steps as you get closer. It tells the buyer you're near your limit.
- Keep everything in writing. A phone call can't be checked later.
- Never tell a buyer your lowest price, or why you're selling.
When there's more than one buyer
This is a good problem. Tell every buyer that there are other offers, and ask them all for their best offer by the same date and time. Treat them the same and don't share one buyer's figure with another.
You don't have to take the highest price. You can choose the offer with the best mix of price and terms. Ask your lawyer to check the one you prefer before you sign.
Keep a buffer between you and the buyer
Agents are useful in a negotiation mainly because they stand between the two sides. You can build the same buffer yourself. Ask for offers in writing instead of discussing price on the doorstep. Give yourself time before you reply. Talk the offer through with someone who isn't emotionally involved.
Before you sign
Show the final terms to your lawyer first. Once you've both signed, you're committed. Our guide to the Sale and Purchase Agreement explains why.
How Praedium helps
Praedium is built to be that buffer. Every offer arrives in your portal in writing, on the record. Praedium Copilot, your AI coach, helps you weigh each one up and suggests what to counter. It only ever advises you: it never contacts a buyer, and you make every decision.
Common questions
Do I have to accept the highest offer on my house?
No. You can accept whichever offer suits you best, or none of them. Conditions, the deposit and the settlement date can matter as much as the price.
Is a verbal offer on a house binding in New Zealand?
No. An agreement to sell a house has to be in writing and signed. Until then, either side can walk away.
What is a backup offer?
A second agreement that only takes effect if the first one falls over. It can be useful while your first buyer is still conditional. Ask your lawyer to set it up properly.
This guide is general information for New Zealand home sellers, not legal, financial or tax advice. Praedium is not a real estate agent. Every sale is different, so talk to your own lawyer or conveyancer before you sign anything.